To Graduates

I know a guy with overbearing parents who is about to graduate from high school. The tendency I have observed among people in his situation is to go wild—to let loose and get crazy.

Some measure of this is probably healthy. One’s freshman year is about the only rite of passage most of us will experience. The Amish have their Rumspringa; the rest of us have college. But acting wild can too quickly take on a life of its own and turn on a person.

I want to hold this young man’s shoulders, look him in the eyes, and say, “Listen, yes, you’ve put up with a lot from your parents all these years. Who knows why? Obviously they were projecting some of their own psychological baggage on you, but hear me: be careful, okay? You are about to experience more independence than you ever imagined. Be careful with it. Party, yes, but don’t go too far. Don’t punish yourself and call it freedom. Be smart. And keep your eye on growing into the person you want to become.”